2 Tim 2:25-26 In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth; And that they may recover themselves out of the snare of the devil, who are taken captive by him at his will.
The Lord has been showing me something that absolutely blew my mind. He said to me, that He is the one that gives repentance, and He gives it based on the disposition of our hearts. When I say give repentance here, I am not referring to the ability to change your ways, but I am referring to the desire to change your ways. If you have the Holy Spirit you already have the ability to maintain a sinless life, but if you walk into sin you can become blinded to spiritual operations. Once such operation is the fact that it is God who grants repentance.
Have you ever been out, and down for the count? Angry inside, bitter, depressed and then you felt peace suddenly rising up in your heart? That is an example of God granting repentance because you actually feel the power to let your sins go and to move on in God. It is feeling the forgiveness of the Lord. But this does not always happen. Why? This feeling will only come when God sees that your heart is willing to obey Him even though things might not be done your way. This may not even be something on the forefront of your mind, but in your heart, you have reached this place. God grants repentance when He can trust you to go on with an honest heart. However, if you delight in sin, you might never feel the power to stand again.
The scary part of it all is that God does not have to grant you repentance. He can allow you to live on and be satisfied with your sin. However, God is gracious to you, isn't He? Yes! And He calls it faithfulness and justice to forgive you (1 John 1:9). This sunrise is no way written to have you dependent on a feeling, rather it is written so you will always fight for holiness. If you are unsure that He has granted you repentance, all you have to do is ask Him to. Do not be obstinate by overriding the conviction of the Holy Spirit, because you may never feel it again. Instead, capitalize on it. Repent and return to your Father and God.
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